“No Comment! Aww, heck. Who am I kidding? We always comment.”

And you thought Ari Fleischer had a tough gig. Imagine trying to be Paris Hilton’s press spokesperson. This comes from the celebrity advocacy journalists at Page Six:
PARIS Hilton – who has already weathered the worldwide circulation of a graphic photo of her exiting a car minus her panties – is now starring in an amateur porno, a la Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee. The video, shot three years ago, features the hot-blooded hotel heiress and Shannen Doherty’s husband, Rick Solomon, in a variety of X-rated activities. Doherty and Solomon split up after the tape was made, but have since reconciled. Hilton “keeps staring into the camera and trying to show her best side,” said a source. “She knows she is being taped and [Solomon] keeps trying to get her into sex positions that are better for taping, if you know what I mean.” An anonymous donor, who may be planning to sell the tape over the Internet, dropped off copies to media people. A rep for Hilton said: “This was something she did with Rick while they were dating, after he was no longer with Shannen, and it was something that was intended for their own personal use. This tape was never intended to be viewed by the public and it is in poor taste that someone has decided to release it.”
If only Fleischer had been this honest. (“There are no W.M.D. The President said that for his own personal use…”)