low culture: New Kosher words

December 19, 2003

New Kosher words

Piggybacking on Gawker's list of words for the New York Media Elite to drop from their vocabularies in 2004 ('Memo from Gawker's Ombudsman'), I'd like to add the following:

Henceforth, the term schadenfreude is to be replaced with sauerkraut, which, in addition to being easier to spell, means just about the same thing.
Irony is to be replaced with relish, which is a less ubiquitous word by far.
Similarly, Ubiquitous is to be replaced with mustard, for obvious reasons.
And finally, twee is to be replaced with katsup while erstwhile is to be replaced with ketchup.

We thank you in advance for your understanding and compliance.

Posted in a Shallow fashion.

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