Hello, anglophiles and throne-watchers! Quick: what have you been missing out on here in the U.S. for the past six years? That's right, a visit by Prince Charles, the future King of England, who hasn't set foot on American soil since coming to New York in 1997.

While this may seem topical only due to President Bush's current visit to the United Kingdom, or maybe recent events in Massachusetts' judiciary, it has nothing to do with American intolerance of homosexuality. We think. The Prince of Wales, after all, isn't gay, for one thing (just check out the photo above: President Bush would never, in good conscience, shake hands with a gay bloke).

But he can shake hands with the "pro-Palestinian" Prince Charles. The Guardian quotes a source close to the issue as saying,

"It [concern over Charles travelling to the US] revolves around the perception that the Prince of Wales is fairly Arabist. He has, in American terms and international terms, fairly dodgy views on Israel.

"He thinks American policy on the Middle East is complete madness and he used to express that quite loudly to a lot of people, including ministers and various ambassadors."

The source added: "The system basically thinks that he is unsound on America and he has not really wanted to go anyway. He doesn't much like American culture."

But, Charles, don't be so unfair! Americans love both selective inbreeding and tampon reincarnation.

It's just this "gay" thing we need to work on. And the Middle East, I guess.